Thursday, December 18, 2008

Carry You

I’ve been looking at a lot of cute blogs out there all decorated with Christmas cheer and here I am posting a song instead and not a holiday one at that. For one, I’ve been listening to it lately, pondering a lot in my heart on God’s grace and mercy that has carried me this past year and another is that the lyrics speak of burdens. I’m burdened for what the season has become and for those around me that are less fortunate or simply hurting more at this time of year for so many reasons. I feel heavy that I can’t reach out overseas to the extent I’d like or even within my own family, our elderly that need help, a touch or even that voice on the other end of the phone that I can so rarely give due to my vocal pain. Though perhaps every little prayer or act can help for the greater good.

I’m also feel I’m carrying a heavy load for my extended family members, which at this point are quite graceful in recognizing my inability to go and do so much or entertain as I used to. At least some of them seem to understand. It effects them and I’m sorry for that. Maybe I’m so burdened as this is the third Christmas since becoming really ill and I now see the celebration through different eyes as well as my Quaker beliefs firming up more through the past 4 years or so, which makes me not want to celebrate in the manner we used to in the past, regardless. It grieves me to see the commercialism and greed when so many have lost their jobs or are going without and realize that I too have been a part of that in my past. I hope not as much now. Even so, this house has too many trees for me to admit in the public domain. Then when deaths occur due to shopping on Black Friday in America, my heart cries a river over what we are teaching this generation to come.

Most of all, I think I just want to break through all the heaviness and remember the real meaning of Christmas and I feel a bit frustrated as that has become so difficult to do in these surroundings with all the chaotic displays, distractions and “have to’s”. But I know what I take my joy in at this time is my belief that one day is not more sacred than another and that Christ’s birth and redemption can be remembered in my heart every day of the year. That takes the pressure off, fills me with hope and reminds me that God really does carry me and catch every tear I cry, as the lyrics convey. Then some how joy breaks through.

So if you are Quaker and viewing this, you may be thinking this song does not seem a bit Quaker nor do I. Likewise if you are Christian and reading some of my words, you may be scratching your head or possibly even shaking it. I’ll get around to addressing my thoughts on that one in the new year as I’m feeling a bit over due there in having my say. But for now as always, I’m receiving the gift of the baby Jesus and the awesome blessing of being his child which tends to beat the pants off anything here on this earth, uplifts me and reminds me there is hope. And one more thing–that is Vince Gill there next to Amy and she remains as good of an example to me today as the first time I saw her in the Lincoln Arena in Nebraska with her first husband so long ago. See there’s enough of God’s love and mercy to go around......more hope people, so won’t you join me in laying down any burdens you may have right now? We are called to do that in every season.

Carry You, Amy Grant

121 comments:

Heather said...

Wonderful song....

It seems to me that you have the season about right. I like the emphasis on family, but not the exclusion of those who have no family. Christmas can be very lonely for the single and unhappy :(

Anonymous said...

I love you and I love Amy. Great tune. Instant tears. Thanks JL. Jmh

Jan Lyn said...

Thanks for reading my meandering thoughts again Heather. I wish you and Richard a lovely, peaceful season. If I was rich enough, I'd pop on in and visit you, Richard and Peter!

To JMH...thanks again for stopping by. It's been one of those "needing to vent" sort of weeks here. ;) Hope some of the tears were good ones and not bad. I love you too! (tears, tears...)

Farrah said...

I think you should post on whatever you like! :-)

Lots of us have struggled with the holidays. I recommend praying with a sincere heart before the season begins and ask for guidance on how to handle it. You probably already do that, but with what frequency? How early? With what determination? I could say all this to myself. I did that one year, and things seemed greatly improved. Forgot to this year until I was already caught up in the swing of things. It went fairly well, but still not to my contentment. Next year, I want to seek His guidance more for the holiday season.

Jan Lyn said...

Thanks for your thoughts, Farrah.
This quote is too cute:

"I could say all this to myself."

Just loved it....yes, I did pray about it all, probably more so than any year as our circumstances are a bit precarious right within my own little family and then we have 3 sets of parents... All in all, things ended up fairly well and I think my kids walked away with the true meaning of the season regardless of some of the hype and some new ways of gift giving helped me convey my sentiments on some of the matter to the kids and relatives.

As far as contentment, I often end up feeling I did the best I could with the Holy Spirit's guidance. I don't ever think I'll be comfortable with the Santa deal, tons of presents and focus on the specific day........some things cannot be negotiated. Guess in the end, God knows our hearts.

Your photos were excellent and I'm so thankful you were well enough to participate and have what appeared to be such a joyful time with family.......seems you have a large one.

Many blessings to you and your guys!

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